Wednesday, March 1st 2011

 

Well, what an adventure!

I am home and I am alive and I am grateful!

Some of you have heard about the “little” accident I just had, and are calling and emailing and asking “Are you OK?!?! What happened??” and so I am writing to you all to share some of this crazy experience (and save myself having to repeat this story over and over as right now I am just hoping to take it easy for a bit)…this is not the update I was intending to write on my long overdue email, but this is where I’m at!

 

 

Basically, all that matters is that I am home and everyone is safe and no one got hurt!

So, here’s is the looooong version, for those of you who want the whole story!

(Otherwise, just read between the lines and check out the pics!)

 

This weekend Zach and I were bringing up the Honda CRV we got from the island because his truck broke down, and well, let’s just say that it didn’t make it, but we did.

We left the island on Sunday to come back up north, he in the little toyota wagon, and me in the new 4 wheel drive CRV, both loaded to the rafters with stuff (house stuff and baby stuff and all sorts of stuff!)….but we got stuck in Hope cause of the snow storm. At the gas station we found out our options of highways to take were closed, as not only were the roads ahead really bad due to the weather, but a trucker had taken out a bridge and lost his life. I was grateful we missed the early ferry or we would likely have already been stuck in the disaster.  We were told one of the roads would open up at midnight, and though Zach didn’t want to miss work, he called in anyway to say he wouldn’t be making it. It wasn’t worth it to him, with me being pregnant, to drive through the night in conditions that would likely still be bad. I of course agreed, so we got a motel and cozied up and hoped it would be clear in the morning. Monday morning, though there were still stories around town of the bad weather conditions, the roads were open and things seemed clear. So we went to the local insurance place to get another day permit for the CRV since the one before expired at midnight. We intended to get it to Canadian Tire in Williams Lake for it’s inspection to clear so we could finally register it after all the new parts and all the days and days of work Zach put into it. (We bought it from a guy who brought it from Ontario but couldn’t register it without all this stuff being done to it.)

Well, as the roads were open we decided to embark on the next leg of the trip and see if it seemed safe to head home…I had a funny feeling as I left Hope and started onto the Fraser Canyon Highway. I felt like there was something big ahead that would be a very challenging experience to go through. But I also felt though like even though I had this feeling, I had to proceed, and that all would be ok. We stopped on the way toward Yale to confirm we both felt it good to go on. The roads were totally drivable and we proceeded in our caravan style. I didn’t even mention the big feeling I had because I knew in my heart that whatever initiation may be ahead, if indeed there was one, all would be well and that we were meant to go forward. Very cautiously I drove on, praying as I began the journey. I intended to stay in my power, calm and present, and reverant to Mother Nature and the canyon, and asked that I be supported and we make it safely through.

Well, miraculously, we did make it safely through. I am in awe that I am alive and I am oh-so-grateful! 

And it’s funny, cause the drive itself was actually really fine the whole time (well, up until a certain point anyway!). The skies were most of the time blue, filled with beautiful sunshine, and the roads were compacted with snow and some ice, but we took it super slow and easy and I felt totally steady and stable throughout the drive…..Right up until just after Spence’s Bridge, just before Cache Creek, on what the friendly police officer later told me is the worst part of the highway. (I might be a little Freudian and accidentally call it Crash Creek now!) Gorgeous though, with all the mountains and hills and sky, and big wild river way down below. Anyway, Zach was driving the vehicle ahead of me, and thankfully no one was coming in the other direction when I hit an extra slippery patch and fish-tailed across the highway, making a great attempt to regain control and slid back the other way, and then spun around and smashed right into a huge CN railray sign. I hope no one needs to report any railroad emergencies at the toll free number any time soon, cause I took the whole huge sign right out of the ground and with me off the road, over the little cliff side and down the hill.

 

 

 

 

 

It was amazing to watch as all this happened, so fast, but like in slow motion at the same time. Funnily enough, I was able to stay totally calm and present as I realized there was nothing I could do but let fate take it’s course. I surrendered completely and let my body stay relaxed as I rolled and rolled and finally crashed to a halt. The vehicle landed on it’s side, my driver’s side, wheels in the air, and broken glass and random once-were-carefully packed belongings all around me.

 

I emerged pretty in shock and awe, feeling how miraculous it was that not only was I alive, but I wasn’t hurt. A little shaky, but somehow still peaceful, I turned off the key, and undid my seat belt. I had a pillow and blanket on my lap that I lifted and shook the glass out of, as well as a little piece of glass that somehow found it’s way into my mouth that I removed, and all sorts of things all around me. I stood up on the ground with my feet through the broken driver’s side window, and looked out the missing sun roof, and then out the broken passenger side window at the gorgeous day, the snowy hill and all the sage bushes around me and the river that was sparkling with sunlight. What just happened?!?!?!

I knew I was totally fine, and that the 7 1/2 month angel in my belly was also totally fine, as while we rolled and crashed somehow we didn’t absorb any of the impact. After watching the sign coming at me, (or rather as we were propelled at it!) and I realized we were going to go down, I loosely protected my face and belly, let my body and mind stay relaxed and was nicely cushioned in my seat through the accident. But wow I knew the CRV didn’t have such luck! It was pretty wild to later see how totally destroyed it was, but that I emerged with only one little scratch on my hand.

 

I will never forget the terrified look on Zach’s face when he came running down the cliff and up to the car. It was amazing to be able to tell him we were totally ok, and hug him and hold his hand, even with the metal barrier of the wrecked vehicle between us.

The love and peace and gratitude I felt totally outweighed the intensity and crazyness of what had just happened.

 

Within another minute, an angelic woman appeared on the scene. Her blonde hair and light-filled crystal blue eyes, her compassionate and kind energy was also so soothing. When she asked if there was anyone else in the vehicle and I told her it was just me and the little baby in my belly, she exclaimed that she was a maternity nurse (in fact, she turned out to be the medicine and maternity program manager at the hospital in Quesnel!)…could I have been in better hands? Well, apparently, because only moments after that, another man showed up, who happened to be a fireman! They all helped me climb out one of the broken windows and affirmed that I was indeed ok. It was freeeeeezing cold and the wind was brisk and sharp. I was so grateful that the sun was out and it wasn’t snowing or raining or later in the day.

Though I truly wanted to just stand there in amazement of being alive, and inspect the totalled vehicle and collect all my belongings all over, Zach and this angel named Tamara insisted I get up out of there and get into a warm vehicle, so they helped me up the hill and across the highway. I sat in the car not really knowing what to do next, while she called 911. There had been another accident, just 10 minutes down the road, so even more help was very close by. An ambulance arrived, and then a police truck….And a tow truck was apparently very busy that day, but on the way.

I got out of the warm car because I just had to go back down to see the crashed vehicle again, and have a reality check of this whole thing that felt so surreal. I have no words to describe what it was like to look down on the scene. To walk back down and around the smashed and crushed and broken CRV. No words to describe what it felt like to look at it, nor to describe the miraculous awe and gratitude that I felt to be able to actually be alive and walking around it! And, in such a beautiful place! It was bitter-sweet indeed.

Tamara offered to take me to the hospital to get checked out in Williams Lake. She even offered to take a bunch of the stuff we had in the CRV to Williams Lake for us, which was so very kind and so helpful. I was incredibly inspired by her genuine warmth and kindness. Her patience and selflessness was truly angelic. I am so grateful to know there are people like her in the world right there for us when we need them. I felt so loved and cared for! Just the warmth of her embrace was a blessing I couldn’t have been more grateful for!

After doing the accident report, we were standing on the side of the highway in the winter air, looking down at the crashed and up on it’s side CRV. The police man joked that he would have to fine me as I was in a no-parking zone. I joked back that I had a very close look at the sign I took out and that it didn’t say anything about parking!

It was pretty crazy to watch the tow truck driver, once he finally arrived, do his work to get the vehicle back on it’s wheels and up the hill. I also had to stand by and watch some of my favorite belongings fall out of opened and up-turned boxes, out the broken windows and into the snow. I knew these things didn’t really matter, but it still was hard to watch. Thankfully I was able to collect all the pieces and get them back up to be brought home. The brand new hot water tank that was strapped to my roof was off to the side of the vehicle in the snow, still attached to the ripped-off and broken roof racks, and hopefully not too dented to still work. We got it up too, along with a big garbage bag of side mirrors and car pieces and parts that were splayed through the bushes and in the snow. Eventually, we followed the tow truck and what was once a beautiful vehicle on it’s maiden voyage, to the wreck lot in Cache Creek. It was disapointing and quite disheartening to say the least, to be on the phone with ICBC and find out that because of the temporary permit that only had basic coverage, absolutely nothing would be covered, and then a few minutes later get a $300 tow bill, but I still had to stay focused on the amazing fact that I was alive and well!

It was such a long cold day, and even though when we finally got home we couldn’t make it up our driveway cause of all the fresh snow, and even though the rickety little old cabin was chill-to-the-bone cold inside, and even though the water pipes were all frozen, and even though it was midnight and we were beyond exhausted and had to get up in 5 hours for Zach to go to work…even though we had a wrecked vehicle that we put so much time and money and energy into and were never going to be able to enjoy or get anything back out of…even though there was so much I could’ve focused on being bummed about, I went to bed feeling the incredible miracle of life…the beautiful life growing inside me, and the beautiful gift of being alive!

I’m sure anyone who has been in an accident can relate to my experience. And anyone who hasn’t, well, I hope my sharing deeply connects you to the preciousness of life and loved ones!

In Love,

Sasha